I was talking with a friend about times in our lives when our thoughts and emotions make us feel very un-grown up. And she asked the question, "Sometimes I wonder", she said, "do we ever really grow up?" I think she has something there because lately my life seems to be overwhelming me just a little and I can't seem to keep things in check. Little cats are scooting about and my mind whirs. I'm in one of those periods in my life where I realize that I thought I had things all figured out but the chaos inside causes me to come up short and accept that I don't. It's a bit of an emotional free fall. I am sure that this is a necessary correction - like the economy, my ego grows and grows and then events called corrections come along and take a little wind out of the sails.
The things that tie me down and keep me earthbound are Doug (especially) and our children. Doug is a saint. He is kind and funny, charming and sexy, smart and loyal (exceedingly loyal). Sometimes I think I don't deserve him.
Amidst the turmoil we play Super Mario Brothers and Smarty Pants. I can't really go batty when we have Mario and Luigi to pull me back.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Thursday, March 06, 2008
...Fry It Up in a Pan
I have an amazing husband. He does more housework than me, and at least equal child care. Turns out, this may work to his advantage:
Men who do housework may get more sex
By DAVID CRARY, AP National Writer
NEW YORK - American men still don't pull their weight when it comes to housework and child care, but collectively they're not the slackers they used to be. The average dad has gradually been getting better about picking himself up off the sofa and pitching in, according to a new report in which a psychologist suggests the payoff for doing more chores could be more sex.
The report, released Thursday by the Council on Contemporary Families, summarizes several recent studies on family dynamics. One found that men's contribution to housework had doubled over the past four decades; another found they tripled the time spent on child care over that span.
"If a guy does housework, it looks to the woman like he really cares about her — he's not treating her like a servant," said Coleman, who is affiliated with the Council on Contemporary Families. "And if a woman feels stressed out because the house is a mess and the guy's sitting on the couch while she's vacuuming, that's not going to put her in the mood."
Friday, February 29, 2008
Mothers In Law
My mother-in-law is really something. She is in a nursing home now, having suffered a stroke and is now feeling the full force of her dementia kick in. I have campaigned mightily for years that something was going on up there in that head of hers that just wasn't completely right and now, confirmation. It's a relief, in a way, and she's gotten some good medication to help with it.
When Dwight, my brother-in-law, went out to Iowa last, he signed some papers giving him durable power of attorney for her. When they went to the attorney's office to sign, Betty (my MIL) told the attorney that it was really good that Dwight had this power, him being a certified electrician and all, because that way he would know just when to pull the plug.
Ah, the mind reels. I see her, in her mind's eye, picturing herself all hooked up to gadgets and machines and everything runs to one giant plug in the wall. She comforted herself believing that at just the proper moment, Dwight would sidle up to that wall and give that plug a yank, knowing as he would (he's an electrician after all) that he could stick a fork in her and turn her over: She's Done.
I once had a conversation with Betty about taking it easy in her later years (she's 85 now). She was working every day at David's Greenhouse, the business my other brother-in-law ran in Atlantic, Iowa for years. She changed the subject complaining about the high cost of gas. So I made the observation that if she quit working at the greenhouse every day she could save on the expense of gas. She said, "oh, it doesn't take any gas to get to the greenhouse! It's all downhill." I, (silly, silly me) pointed out that she still had to drive home. But she outfoxed me. She said, "Oh, no! Coming home, I go a different way!"
When Dwight, my brother-in-law, went out to Iowa last, he signed some papers giving him durable power of attorney for her. When they went to the attorney's office to sign, Betty (my MIL) told the attorney that it was really good that Dwight had this power, him being a certified electrician and all, because that way he would know just when to pull the plug.
Ah, the mind reels. I see her, in her mind's eye, picturing herself all hooked up to gadgets and machines and everything runs to one giant plug in the wall. She comforted herself believing that at just the proper moment, Dwight would sidle up to that wall and give that plug a yank, knowing as he would (he's an electrician after all) that he could stick a fork in her and turn her over: She's Done.
I once had a conversation with Betty about taking it easy in her later years (she's 85 now). She was working every day at David's Greenhouse, the business my other brother-in-law ran in Atlantic, Iowa for years. She changed the subject complaining about the high cost of gas. So I made the observation that if she quit working at the greenhouse every day she could save on the expense of gas. She said, "oh, it doesn't take any gas to get to the greenhouse! It's all downhill." I, (silly, silly me) pointed out that she still had to drive home. But she outfoxed me. She said, "Oh, no! Coming home, I go a different way!"
Movie Night
Doug just took the boys to 'kids night out' up at the school and we are going to go see No Country for Old Men! About once a month the junior high kids offer a kids night out (read: Parents Night Out) and we always take the kids up there. One of the things that happens when you don't have family in town is that you rarely get out - or it's a big production to get out. So, when the school offers the night out (as a fundraiser) we take them up on it!
It's a CIRCUS theme and Doug just had to say something about clowns, causing Wilbur to rail against the whole idea. I don't blame him, I don't like clowns either. They scare me and they scare Wilbur!
I picked them up from school and got them all full o' fat with McDonalds and then they go back up to school with all their friends and we get to go see a movie.
We are really excited to see this film, and we'd like to see Juno and the film with Phillip Seymour Hoffman (is it Savages?)...
Emery also told me that next week on American Idol Miley Cyrus will be on. He asked me if I knew who that was... I said, "Hannah Montana?" and he said, "The VOICE of Hannah Montana. Always has to get more specific.
We are just at that age with Em where cultural relevance is very important.
I am almost finished with Snow Flower and the Secret Fan, which Lisa lent me. A very good read by Lisa See.
This weekend Emery is going on his first real sleepover. Very exciting. I am going to drop him off at his best friend's house tomorrow at noon. Hopefully it will go well.
It's a CIRCUS theme and Doug just had to say something about clowns, causing Wilbur to rail against the whole idea. I don't blame him, I don't like clowns either. They scare me and they scare Wilbur!
I picked them up from school and got them all full o' fat with McDonalds and then they go back up to school with all their friends and we get to go see a movie.
We are really excited to see this film, and we'd like to see Juno and the film with Phillip Seymour Hoffman (is it Savages?)...
Emery also told me that next week on American Idol Miley Cyrus will be on. He asked me if I knew who that was... I said, "Hannah Montana?" and he said, "The VOICE of Hannah Montana. Always has to get more specific.
We are just at that age with Em where cultural relevance is very important.
I am almost finished with Snow Flower and the Secret Fan, which Lisa lent me. A very good read by Lisa See.
This weekend Emery is going on his first real sleepover. Very exciting. I am going to drop him off at his best friend's house tomorrow at noon. Hopefully it will go well.
Marianne Williamson
Marianne Williamson wrote a special note to Oprah Winfrey on the ocassion of Oprah's 50th birthday. I want to commit this to memory and share it with my dear husband and all of my friends - this is how I feel about those dearest to me:
"In that holy place where you tell Him everything and He understands, there are angels who stand and wait to hear His every command. How may they serve you and increase your joy? I stand with them for this you have done for me."
Thursday, February 28, 2008
don't slap me cause I'm not in the mood
I could just slap Ms. Hartman... After one week in NY we are now watching American Idol. Doug says to me last night, with a chuckle, as that awful AI music started up, "So we are Idol watchers now?" And yet, he kept coming into the living room to watch the sundry performances. What the Hell happened to us? We think we are cultural elites. We aspire to be Cafe Society. Sometimes we even think we are intellectuals. I cannot be an Idol watcher! Simply awful.
However, I must say that this Amanda person with the fright wig absolutely must go. She cannot even *kind of* sing. What a pedestrian and inane show. Why did we watch it?
One thing it has going for it is that Simon character, the polemicist. "You are verging on haunted" must rank right up there. And, "Astonishingly, I must agree with Poe-lah"
I enjoyed Project Runway last night, but I didn't love either collection from those two who were duking it out. Just so so.
However, I must say that this Amanda person with the fright wig absolutely must go. She cannot even *kind of* sing. What a pedestrian and inane show. Why did we watch it?
One thing it has going for it is that Simon character, the polemicist. "You are verging on haunted" must rank right up there. And, "Astonishingly, I must agree with Poe-lah"
I enjoyed Project Runway last night, but I didn't love either collection from those two who were duking it out. Just so so.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Iowa Test of Basic Skills
Emery brought home a practice test for the ITBS, a standardized test that they are taking next week. Some schools practice and study for weeks prior to taking this test, but Emery is at a priviate Montessori school so they don't do much preparation.
Now, our son doesn't even get grades at his school, so this should be very interesting. I have to say I am just a little nervous about it. We know he's really bright, but we haven't measured it in traditional ways up to this point. Now we are going to have this test come home to tell us how he is doing. It's workin on my nerves a little, I must say.
Emery keeps saying the practice tests are fun - so I keep telling him that's exactly the right attitude to have. He takes the test next week.
Now, our son doesn't even get grades at his school, so this should be very interesting. I have to say I am just a little nervous about it. We know he's really bright, but we haven't measured it in traditional ways up to this point. Now we are going to have this test come home to tell us how he is doing. It's workin on my nerves a little, I must say.
Emery keeps saying the practice tests are fun - so I keep telling him that's exactly the right attitude to have. He takes the test next week.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Snow and St. John the Divine
We have had a lovely time so far in New York. Last night we saw, "In the Heights" a new musical (http://www.intheheightsthemusical.com/). Before we saw the show we met our friends Andy, Dan and Claire at The Irish Rogue for a drink. We had a late lunch yesterday at Les Deux Gamins with Mark Boyett in the W. Village. On Wednesday evening we went to the book signing at Borders (the book was Absolute Brightness by James Lescene who also wrote the film Trevor, 1994 Oscar for best Live Action Short and thus started The Trevor Project, a 24-hour hotline for gay and lesbian teens) and then went to the Stone Rose Lounge. We had a perfect view of the city and the lunar eclipse. Tuesday night we saw Matt and ate at Il Bastardo in Chelsea. During the day on Tuesday Lisa and I went to Town Shop and bra shopped. Then we went to tea at Alice's Teacup (wonderful).
Up in Morningside Heights where we are staying with Michael we've eaten at The Deluxe diner and Tom's Restaurant (of Suzanne Vega and Seinfeld fame), which happens to be a regular old diner at the end of the Michael's block. After eating at Tom's today, we walked over to St. John the Divine (http://www.stjohndivine.org/index.html) and there happened to be a choir concert going on while we walked about. It was serendipitous. The cathedral is meant for choral music so we were thrilled that we got to hear those children's voices - a beautiful choir.
So this evening we will be at Jon and Christopher's with Mike, Matt, John Dullworth, Ken, Lisa & Eric, Bennett & Helen... It will be great.
Up in Morningside Heights where we are staying with Michael we've eaten at The Deluxe diner and Tom's Restaurant (of Suzanne Vega and Seinfeld fame), which happens to be a regular old diner at the end of the Michael's block. After eating at Tom's today, we walked over to St. John the Divine (http://www.stjohndivine.org/index.html) and there happened to be a choir concert going on while we walked about. It was serendipitous. The cathedral is meant for choral music so we were thrilled that we got to hear those children's voices - a beautiful choir.
So this evening we will be at Jon and Christopher's with Mike, Matt, John Dullworth, Ken, Lisa & Eric, Bennett & Helen... It will be great.
Friday, February 15, 2008
It's OK. I hear him choking in there...
Things are KraZi at our house in the morning. It doesn't matter how early we get up, we are always rushing out the door, running late. I'm repeating everything 5 times (Wilbur get up here and eat, Wilbur get up here and eat, Wilbur get up here and eat, Wilbur get up here and eat, Wilbur get up here and eat). I'm asking the same questions again and again each day, "did you brush your teeth?" "Did you pee?" "Do you have your shoes on?" "Could you put your jacket on please?"
This morning we sent Emery in to brush his teeth, which he should have done first thing. As Wilbur was eating and getting dressed (literally at the same time), I called out to Em, "Are you brushing your teeth?" And he says, "I'll get right to it!" Now, he had been in there for 10 minutes - what was he doing in there? So, a little while later I call out again, more insistently, "Are You Brushing Your Teeth??" And Doug says, "Yes, It's ok, he's rinsing, I hear him choking in there"
Whew. Thank Goodness.
This morning we sent Emery in to brush his teeth, which he should have done first thing. As Wilbur was eating and getting dressed (literally at the same time), I called out to Em, "Are you brushing your teeth?" And he says, "I'll get right to it!" Now, he had been in there for 10 minutes - what was he doing in there? So, a little while later I call out again, more insistently, "Are You Brushing Your Teeth??" And Doug says, "Yes, It's ok, he's rinsing, I hear him choking in there"
Whew. Thank Goodness.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Norman Lear and Clay Jenkinson
This morning on NPR I heard a segment of "The Long View" which featured Norman Lear. As I lay there listening I was thinking about our friend and Godfather, Mike, who recently attended a birthday dinner party for Norman Lear's daughter. She is married to Mike's doctor, who is also the CBS Evening News Medical Correspondent: http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/08/14/utility/main1891188.shtml
As I listened to Norman Lear talk about why the constitution is so important to him I also thought about Clay Jenkinson. A Nationally acclaimed humanities scholar and award winning first person interpreter of Thomas Jefferson, Clay Jenkinson, portrays Jefferson on the program, The Thomas Jefferson Hour, and he answers listener questions while in the persona of Jefferson--his answers are grounded in the writings and actions of the great man.
Doug and I saw this man on a local cable channel portraying Jefferson in Tacoma as a guest of the Tacoma Rotary Club. We were so enthralled watching him that although we had just happened on the channel, we couldn't turn our attention away.
Jenkinson believes Thomas Jefferson wrote the most important 35-word sentence in the English language: "We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
http://www.35words.com/index.htm
Finally, Clay Jenkinson has been instrumental in the revival of the modern-day Chautauqua movement. More on that in the above post.
As I listened to Norman Lear talk about why the constitution is so important to him I also thought about Clay Jenkinson. A Nationally acclaimed humanities scholar and award winning first person interpreter of Thomas Jefferson, Clay Jenkinson, portrays Jefferson on the program, The Thomas Jefferson Hour, and he answers listener questions while in the persona of Jefferson--his answers are grounded in the writings and actions of the great man.
Doug and I saw this man on a local cable channel portraying Jefferson in Tacoma as a guest of the Tacoma Rotary Club. We were so enthralled watching him that although we had just happened on the channel, we couldn't turn our attention away.
Jenkinson believes Thomas Jefferson wrote the most important 35-word sentence in the English language: "We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
http://www.35words.com/index.htm
Finally, Clay Jenkinson has been instrumental in the revival of the modern-day Chautauqua movement. More on that in the above post.
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Vision Board
Seattle Repertory Theatre - Invasions of the Public Order
Social Justice Vision:
Eliza Project
House Vision - build according to plan
Eliza Project
House Vision - build according to plan
Nero Marquina marble countertop:
http://www.annsacks.com/onlinecatalog/program.jsp?cat=268804&coll=278204&prg=1192204
Blue grey Ann Sacks tile:
http://www.annsacks.com/onlinecatalog/program.jsp?cat=268004&coll=268104&prg=272004
Aga Range - 44" dual fuel:
http://www.aga-ranges.com/_store/Scripts/prodview.asp?idproduct=80
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