Cuckoo Puffs

Cocoa Puffs Combos
Originally uploaded by danajohnhill

Wilbur has asked me for this cereal, insisting that it's called Coo-Coo Puffs. I tried to say that the bird says he's cuckoo for cocoa puffs but he gets very frustrated with me and says, "No, it's COO COO FOR CO-CO PUFFS!"

Seattle Pride

Our church marched in the Gay Pride parade yesterday - Doug stayed home with the boys and I marched. It was a beautiful Seattle day and it was a great parade. We waved and blew kisses and tried to show the gay community that there are churches where they are welcomed and wanted.

That was the cap to a wonderful weekend. We saw The Tempest on Friday night with our friend Bradley Goodwill as Alonzo. We stayed out until almost 2 AM that night. We had taken Leigh and Alex with us and they took us out to Via Tribunali after the show. Matt, in town for Catch Me If You Can at the 5th Avenue, met us also. Matt brought the musical director for Catch Me (his friend John) and we all had a marvelous time.

I hope that Leigh and Alex think it's fun to meet these people - these friends of ours. I hope we don't make them uncomfortable. Sometimes I wonder about that. We have all these friends who are theater people and I hope they find it fun and not tiresome to hang out with us.

Saturday the boys went to the Doyle's for brothers' day - an annual event now with them. Brian and Brandi Doyle are lots of fun and their kids and Wilbur are bosom buddies. So, I dropped them off at noon. We spent a little time alone, just the two of us, and then we went by a graduation reception for a boy who has done some sitting for us. Then we went back to the Doyle's for dinner and to pick up the boys. Wilbur cried his eyes out when we left - a total melt down. "I don't want to go-oh-oh-oh!!"

Yesterday was the pride parade. I feel like thank god it's Monday, because I am exhausted.

I got posted on Hey Rude!

Check out my friend Helene's site about rude behavior in New York City! You'll see that they posted one of my submissions:

http://www.heyrude.com/2009/06/who-are-these-people-clean-up-after.html

City-sponsored meetings for gays trigger showdown over privacy vs. public records

City%2Dsponsored%20meetings%20for%20gays%20trigger%20showdown%20over%20privacy%20vs%2E%20public%20records

Shared via AddThis

This is why I'm marching in the Pride Parade here in Seattle on June 28th. Not b/c I care about private vs. public records, but because a guy like this is out there spending all his spare time making sure no one is getting ahead of him in his race of rats.

Sage about Age

Wrinkled Elegance
Originally uploaded by Athary

I think this is what's hard about aging: the -ing. It continues and it's ongoing. It's in process. It's not done.

I look in the mirror and I don't like a change I see. I realize the inevitability of the new wrinkle or the sag or just the alteration in the nature of my skin. Then I come to acceptance - of that, the way it is that day. But then I realize that I am not frozen in time and it's not going to stay 'this good'. That's what happens. I have never aspired to look like I'm in my Early 40s. But now, given that I'm almost in my mid-40s and then I'll be in my late 40s and then my early 50s (and the beat goes on), hanging on to the early 40s look sounds good.

100 dollar words

Yesterday Emery was upstairs trying to watch a program 'On Demand' and he was struggling with the remote. I heard him grunt and get mad and I asked what was up. He said, "It's this remote! I can't get the infernal thing to work!"

This morning Wilbur is watching his requisite Backyardigans before school (it seems like they watch a lot of TV)... It's the Viking Voyage episode. Wilbur called out, "It's a whirlpool!" and Emery said, "It's more like a maelstrom. A maelstrom is even more powerful."

Happy Birthday Son

Today my oldest boy is 10 years old. I can't believe it. How can I describe how much joy this child has brought into our lives? We call him our good luck charm because it seems that after he was born, everything fell into place.

It is certainly a journey that I couldn't imagine before I had him, and it's a journey that is so different today than when he was a baby. I used to see families with their children in the 'tween years and think that wouldn't be as fun as when they were babies. But it's much more enjoyable as they get older - the struggles grow, too. Not being able to protect my son, seeing his friends' influence outweigh ours, realizing that there is nothing I can do to make him a popular kid or the leader among his peers (that they have something to say about that), is not easy. It was certainly much easier to dress him in something adorable and ask him to smile.

Now, he has awkward moments and goofy moments. He is silly in that funny way boys have as they figure out how to tell a joke and then practice being un-enthused (oh. cool. -- I hear that a lot); they do that thing where they act like they are nonplussed and unimpressed. There are moments when I want to be able to punish him the way I used to and still punish Wilbur, sitting on the steps and taking a time out. But by the age of 9 and certainly now that he's 10, that just doesn't cut it anymore. The consequences require thoughtful consideration for every infraction, and every infraction can't warrant punishment. If I punished him every time he rolled his eyes at me there would be no 'time in' -- it would all be time out. So, I choose my battles and focus on the heinous deeds; a particularly nasty tone, complete refusals and uncompleted but required tasks (homework). And I try to stay the one he wants to talk to about hurt feelings and disappointments. Someone told me once that with boys you should be doing something alongside them to open up a conversation about feelings and needs - and she was absolutely right. If I'm not looking at him, he'll open up and tell me about the hard time someone is giving him, his first crush on a girl way out of his league (two years older, a 6th grader!), and how he wants to be part of a tougher crowd of boys at school but he's not quite making it.

It's not really something I could imagine 10 years ago as I labored for 36 hours without so much as a Tylenol, asking for street drugs or a sledgehammer. And truthfully, it's better that we don't really know what we're getting ourselves into, what we'll feel, how we'll struggle. You wouldn't have the energy for that journey at the start of the trip, and you'd set yourself up to fail. The only way to do it is the way we have to do it, a day at a time.