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Sunday, October 26, 2008

No Offense But...

Emery often begins a sentence with this phrase, "No offense Mom, but..." Each time I tell him that whenever he begins a sentence this way, he causes me offense.

A parent gave me some very, very good advice, which I find almost impossible to heed: Don't Take It Personally.

She said 'don't take it all so personally, all this stuff they do and the things they say and their boorish behavior.' She told me that by kid 3 of 4 she started to realize this in her own life - that when they complained or tried to act cool or said insulting things or said, "no offense but..." she just wouldn't take it personally.

When I am able to apply this principle, I am amazed at the result. But, even though I am a mother, I am clearly just a regular person as well. And when I work hard all day and then come home and really try to make a delicious and nutritious dinner using organic ingredients after purchasing these items with my re-usable bags and someone crinkles up his nose and makes a face like he is being asked to smell shit and says, "No offense Mom but this stuff STIIIIINNNNKKKKSSSS!" - call me psycho, but I take it as a personal affront.

I realize though that it's not personal. Sometimes they just say crap to say crap. Sometimes they just want to hear themselves talk. When did I decide that a 9-year-old was the arbiter of taste or a good judge of what's delicious? And it's no big deal. I know how nutritious and delicious it is, and I know he's going to eat it too. I enjoy that power. So, let it go Paige. Don't take it so personally. Remember who has got the upper hand here. And let him be.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Yes, but sometimes it is necessary to CRUSH them. For their own good. But CRUSH them.

KCG said...

I love this post.